Introduction
The traditional role of the father and the mother in raising a child is often assumed to be disproportionate and unequal. Fathers often play secondary roles to mothers when it comes to nurturing, creating and maintaining parental bonds with their children. One of the few roles that mothers possess exclusively is ‘gestation’ and ‘lactation’.
Gestation and Lactation: The Two Uniquely Female Processes in Parenting
Gestation and lactation are two processes that are uniquely ‘female’; it is something that only mothers can do for their children. Gestation is the period of time that a baby is carried in the uterus, where it develops and grows. It occurs within the female body, and is therefore restricted to only to women. Lactation is the secretion of milk by the mammary glands, commonly referred to as ‘breastfeeding’. This provides the essential nutrients to the baby, and is essential to child’s survival and growth. It too occurs only within the female body and is the responsibility of the mother.
These two processes are what set mothers apart from fathers in the argument of parenting. While fathers are expected to perform nearly all other parental roles, including providing emotional and financial support, nurturing, and teaching, gestation and lactation remain solely the responsibility of the mother.
The Impact of Gestation and Lactation on Fatherhood
The fact that these two processes remain inaccessible to fathers creates an imbalance in parenthood; fathers are prevented from providing the same level of care and nourishment to their own children. While motherhood carries the unique title of “lifetime nurturer”, a father’s role is limited to that of a secondary contributor in the physical aspect of parenting. This can cause a sense of disconnect with the child, as felt by the father, and can also lead to feelings of inadequacy, frustration and helplessness that are specific to men as fathers.
This has resulted in a ‘fatherhood gap’; men, thereby, have begun to rely heavily on their paternal instincts and have sought to compensate for the lack of opportunities with the presence of others in their lives. Fathers are more likely to be involved in the parenting process, and are more likely to be available to their children in the ways that they can. They invest more time in nurturing their children, understanding their needs and creating a relationship based on trust and empathy. It has also prompted a number of innovative solutions that allow men to experience some of the joys of gestation and lactation. These include infant bonding classes, artificial wombs, and even technology that allows a father to store and express his own breastmilk (Momsanity, 2020).
Benefits of Dads Participating in the Parenting Process
Despite the absence of menstruation and lactation, fathers can still make incredible contributions to the well-being and development of their children. Fathers who are actively involved in their children’s lives are more likely to provide emotional, financial and social support to them, important factors in the growth of healthy and well-rounded children. Fathers have an imperative role in teaching and instilling values in their children, forming relationships based in mutual respect and trust, and providing others with a role model to emulate.
Fathers are often also the ones responsible for instilling a sense of discipline in their children – something that mothers may not always be entirely comfortable with. Fathers can also serve as a source of much-needed inspiration and motivation for their children. It is this type of positive influence that can give children the confidence to believe in themselves and reach their fullest potential.
Conclusion
Gestation and lactation continue to remain the two exclusively female processes in parenting, essential in the child’s development and growth. Fathers often have to play catch-up in contribution and involvement, given the presence of these two processes in a mother’s experience that they cannot access. But, despite this imbalance, fathers have an important role to play in the lives of their children, which, when done correctly, helps to create harmonious family dynamics and better relationships between fathers and their children.
FAQ’s
Q. What is the significance of gestation and lactation in parenting?
A. Gestation and lactation are the two unique processes that are specific to women and mothers in parenting. Gestation is the period of time that a baby is carried in the uterus, where it develops and grows, and lactation is the secretion of milk by the mammary glands, commonly referred to as “breastfeeding”. These two processes are essential for the child’s survival and growth, and thus set mothers apart from fathers in the argument of parenting.
Q. How does the lack of these processes for fathers affect them?
A. Fathers often have to play catch-up in contribution and involvement, given the presence of these two processes in a mother’s experience that they cannot access. This can cause a sense of disconnect with the child, as felt by the father, and can also lead to feelings of inadequacy, frustration and helplessness that are specific to men as fathers.
Q. What are some of the ways fathers can be involved in parenting without gestation and lactation?
A. Fathers can still make incredible contributions to the well-being and development of their children. Fathers who are actively involved in their children’s lives are more likely to provide emotional, financial and social support to them, important factors in the growth of healthy and well-rounded children. Fathers have an imperative role in teaching and instilling values in their children, forming relationships based in mutual respect and trust, and providing others with a role model to emulate. Fathers are often also the ones responsible for instilling a sense of discipline in their children – something that mothers may not always be entirely comfortable with. Fathers can also serve as a source of much-needed inspiration and motivation for their children.
Q. Are there any innovative solutions that allow men to experience some of the joys of gestation and lactation?
A. Yes, modern technology has created a number of innovative solutions that allow men to experience some of the joys of gestation and lactation. These include infant bonding classes, artificial wombs, and even technology that allows a father to store and express his own breastmilk (Momsanity, 2020).
